妙趣橫生英語笑話四則

妙趣橫生英語笑話四則

　　幽默笑話，能讓你在信手翻啟間開懷一笑，得到身心的徹底放松、心緒的怦然萌動、情感的欣然釋放。下面學習啦小編為大家帶來妙趣橫生的英語笑話四則，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　妙趣橫生的英語笑話：你太晚了

　　On a bus a man discovered a pickpocket's hand thrust into his pocket.

　　"sorry," he said to the pickpocket, "you are too late. MY wife did it before you."

　　在公共汽車上，有個人發現小偷把手伸到了他的口袋里o

　　"對不起,"他對小偷說，"你太晚了，我妻子在你之前就做過同樣的事情了。”

　　妙趣橫生的英語笑話：你做了什么壞事

　　It was the Christmas season and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner, “What is your offense?”

　　圣誕佳節到來，法官心情愉悅地問犯人：“你做了什么壞事啊?”

　　“I did my Christmas shopping early this year,” cried the prisoner.

　　“我今年圣誕節購物早了些”犯人回答。

　　“There's nothing wrong with that,” said the Judge. How early were you doing this shopping?”

　　“這么做沒錯啊，”法官說：“到底多早之前啊?“

　　“Before the store opened, ”answered the prisoner.

　　“商店開門之前“犯人答道。

　　妙趣橫生的英語笑話：放屁的問題

　　A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, ¨Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it doesn't really bother me too much. They never small and are always silent.

　　有位小老太太去看醫生，她對醫生說：”醫生，我有愛放屁的毛病。其實也不是大問題，因為我放屁不臭而且沒聲音。

　　As a matter Of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know l was farting because they don't smell and are silent.” The doctor says, ¨I see, Here's aprescription.

　　事實上，自從我進了你辦公室后，已經放了至少20個屁了，但是你并不知道對吧，因為我的屁不臭，而且還沒聲音。"醫生說：“好的，我明白了。

　　Take these piles 3 times a day for seven days and come back to see me next week." The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, ¨I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts…although still silent... stink terribly.

　　吃這個藥片，一天三次連續吃七天，下星期你再來。一個星期后，老太太來了，¨醫生，你到底給的我什么藥，現在我放屁還是沒聲音。

　　The doctor says, “Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's start working on your hearing."

　　但是怎么這么臭"醫生說：太好了!既然你的嗅覺正常了，門開始治聽覺吧。¨

　　妙趣橫生的英語笑話：假如生活是一臺電腦

　　You could add/remove someone in your life using the control panel. You could put your kids in the recycle bin and restore them when you feel like it ! You could improve your appearance by adjusting the display settings. You could turn off the speakers when life gets too noisy. You could click on "find"( Ctrl,F)to recover your lost remote control and car keys. To get your daily exercise,just click on "run"!if you mess up your life,you could always press "Ctrl,Alt,Delete" and start all over!

　　你可以通過控制面板增加或者刪除一些人：可以把孩子放進回收站，然后在你喜歡的時候再還原;可以通過調整顯示器的設置讓外袁更好看：可以在吵鬧的時候關掉音箱;可以點擊¨搜索¨找到丟失了的遙控器和車鑰匙：鍛煉身體的時候，點擊¨運行¨。要是你的生活一團糟，同時按下¨ctrl，alt,delete 鍵，一切就會重新開始。