關于小學簡單英文笑話
冷笑話是近幾年新興的一種語言現象,它輕松詼諧、別具一格,給我們緊張的生活增添了幾分輕松的情趣,它一出現便受到了大多數人的喜愛。本文是關于小學簡單英文笑話，希望對大家有幫助!
關于小學簡單英文笑話：Ice Fishing
One day a rather inebriated ice fisherman drilled a hole in the ice and peered into the hole and a loud voice said, "There are no fish down there." He walked several yards away and drilled another hole and peered into the hole and again the voice said, "There's no fish down there." He then walked about 50 yards away and drilled another hole and again the voice said, "There's no fish down there." He looked up into the sky and asked, "God, is that you?" "No, you idiot," the voice said, "it's the rink manager."
關于小學簡單英文笑話：Size Of The Mothballs
Why do moths fly with their legs open ?
Have you seen the size of mothballs?!
關于小學簡單英文笑話： Ernesto the Caretaker
At dawn the telephone rings. "Hello, Senor? This is Ernesto the caretaker at your country house." "Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?" "Um, I am just calling to advise you, sir, that your parrot died."
"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?" "Si, that's the one." "Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird.
What did he die from?" "From eating rotten meat." "Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?" "Nobody, Senor. He ate the meat of one of the dead horse."
"Dead horse? What dead horse?" "The thoroughbred, Mr. Lucky. He died from all that work pulling the water cart." "Are you insane? What water cart?" "The one we used to put out the fire."
"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?" "The one at your house! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire." "What the.....!!! But there's electricity at the house!!! What was the candle for?"
"For the funeral." "WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL?!" "Your wife's... She showed up one night out of the blue and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Tiger Woods Nike Driver."
SILENCE...
"Ernesto! If you broke that driver YOU'RE FIRED!"
關于小學簡單英文笑話：Identifying Gender
A little old lady buys a pair of parrots, but cannot identify their
sexes. She calls the shop, and the man there advises her to watch them carefully and all would become clear in time.
She spends weeks staring at the cage and eventually catches them doing what comes naturally. To make sure she doesn't get them mixed up again, she cuts out a ring from a piece ofcardboard and puts it round the male parrot's neck.
A while later, the local priest visits the old lady. The male parrot
takes one look at the father's collar, wolf whistles, and says, "I see she caught YOU at it, too."
關于小學簡單英文笑話：Definitely Means
A nursery school teacher says to her class, "Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?"
First a little girl says, "The sky is definitely blue."
The teacher says, "Sorry, Amy, but the sky can sometimes be gray, or black."
A second little boy says, "Trees are definitely green."
"Sorry, but in the autumn, the trees are brown."
Then little Johnny from the back of the class stands up and asks, "Does a fart have lumps?"
The teacher looks horrified and says, "Johnny! Of course not!!!"
"OK...then I DEFINITELY shit my pants!"
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