This is just a little too much for the guy who thinks he is losing his mind. He wonders if he is hallucinating, so he goes to the window and draws back the blind. Outside on his front lawn is the Klu Klux Klan and dangling from the tree is an open noose, empty. They appear to be beckoning him and shouting.

　　Now the guy is really freaked out, he quickly draws the blind and turns around.

　　In the corner of his kitchen is a leprechaun, obviously drunk as well.

　　He asks the leprechaun what is going on.

　　"Well," says the leprechaun, "I was drunk last night as well, and as I was crossing the road, I was nearly run down. You ran across the road and pushed me to safety, so I granted you three wishes in return for saving me."

　　"Well, I can guess the first one" says the guy, "Supermodel, bed, yeah I got that one. What about the other two?"

　　"The money in the fridge?" says the leprechaun, "You asked for a cool million."

　　"And them out there?" asks the guy,

　　"You said you wanted to be hung like a black man."

　　關于笑死人的英語笑話：Who Gets The Dog?

　　A clergyman was walking down the street when he came upon a group of about a dozen boys, all of them between 10 and 12 years of age.

　　The group surrounded a dog. Concerned lest the boys were hurting the dog, he went over and asked "What are you doing with that dog?"

　　One of the boys replied, "This dog is just an old neighborhood stray. We all want him, but only one of us can take him home. So we've decided that whichever one of us can tell the biggest lie will get to keep the dog."

　　Of course, the Reverend was taken aback. "You boys shouldn't be having a contest telling lies!" he exclaimed. He then launched into a ten minute sermon against lying, beginning, "Don't you boys know it's a sin to lie?" and ending with, "Why, when I was your age, I never told a lie."

　　There was dead silence for about a minute. Just as the Reverend was beginning to think he'd gotten through to them, the smallest boy gave a deep sigh and said, "All right, give him the dog."

　　關于笑死人的英語笑話：Borrow The Truck

　　A white girl came up to her dad who was sitting in a beaten up armchair. "Pa, kin ah borrow the truck to-nahgt?" she asked. Her dad looked up to her and said, "Darlin', yewknow what yew haf t'do if'n yew wants to borrer th' truck." "But Pa! Ah haf t'go naow!" the white girl cried. Her daddy stood up and unzipped his pants. "Yew know perfectly well what yew haf t'do. On yer knees, bitch!" The white girl complied and started sucking her dad's cock. After a few seconds she stopped in disgust and looked up to her dad. "GeePa, yore dick shore tastes like shit!" Her dad slapped his forhead and said, "Dammit, Ah forgot! Ah already loaned the truck to yer brother just a few minutes ago!"

　　關于笑死人的英語笑話：Things Were Tougher Then

　　There were three prostitutes living together, a mother, daughter and grandmother. One night the daughter came home looking very down. "How did you get on tonight Dear?" asked her mother.

　　"Not too good," replied the daughter. "I only got for a blow job."

　　"Wow!" said the mother, "In my day we gave a blow job for 50 cents!"

　　"Good God!" said the Grandmother. "In my day we were just glad to get something warm in our stomachs!"

　　
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