經(jīng)典外國(guó)幽默笑話四則

　　笑話是一種增強(qiáng)快樂(lè)的文化，常常以篇幅短小，故事情節(jié)簡(jiǎn)單，文筆巧妙的形式出現(xiàn)，給人以出乎意料，并且取得笑意的藝術(shù)效果的文化。在忙碌的生活，我們也需要偶爾的放松一下自己。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)外國(guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話四則，希望大家喜歡!

　　外國(guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話：補(bǔ)洞

　　A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible,” she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”

　　丈夫下班回到家里，發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的新娘心緒煩亂。“我心里太難受了，”她說(shuō)。“我在給你熨西裝時(shí)把褲子的臀部燒了個(gè)大洞。”

　　“Forget it ,” consoled her husband. “Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that suit.”

　　“沒(méi)事兒，”丈夫安慰她說(shuō)。“你忘了我這套衣服有兩條褲子。”

　　“Yes,” said the woman, cheering up. "And it’s lucky you have. I used them to patch the hole.”

　　“是的，”妻子高興地說(shuō)，“幸虧你還有一條，我后來(lái)就用它來(lái)補(bǔ)了這個(gè)洞了。”

　　外國(guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話：健忘癥

　　An older lady gets undressed and starts to get into the bathtub. She gets about halfway into the tub and thinks, "Was I getting into the tub or getting out?”

　　一個(gè)上了年紀(jì)的女人脫了衣服準(zhǔn)備去洗澡。她剛把一只腳邁進(jìn)浴缸就想:我是打算進(jìn)去呢?還是正要出去?

　　She calls out, "Bernice! Was I getting into the bathtub or getting out?"

　　她大聲喊:“伯尼斯!我這是正要去洗澡還是打算要出來(lái)呢?”

　　Bernice says, "Well I don’t know. I' 11 have to come up and look.” Bernice starts walking up the stairs to the bathroom, gets halfway up and thinks to herself, “Was I going up the stairs or down? " She calls out "Sally! Was I going up or down the stairs?”

　　伯尼斯說(shuō):“我不知道，我這就上去看看。”伯尼斯開始往樓上的浴室走，走到一半時(shí)想到:我這是要上樓呢還是下樓?她大喊:“莎莉!我這是要上樓呢還是要下樓呢?”

　　Sally, who is just being with Bernice down in the living room calls back,“How should I know?” and thinks to herself, “I' m glad I’m not losing my mind like the other people in this house.”

　　剛還和伯尼斯在樓下客廳里的莎莉喊:“我怎么知道?”她自己想:我真的很高興我不像這個(gè)屋子里的其它人一樣沒(méi)記性。

　　外國(guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話：是誰(shuí)偷的車

　　Carlson was charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the jury acquitted him. Later that day Carlson came back to the judge who had presided at the hearing.

　　卡爾森被指控盜竊一輛奔馳轎車，經(jīng)過(guò)長(zhǎng)時(shí)間的審訊，陪審團(tuán)將他無(wú)罪釋放。之后，卡爾森找到了聽證會(huì)上主持的法官。

　　“Your honor,” he said, “I want to get out a warrant for that dirty lawyer of mine.”

　　“法官大人，”他說(shuō)，“我想申請(qǐng)一張逮捕令抓捕那個(gè)骯臟的律師。”

　　“Why?” asked the judge, “He won your acquittal. What do you want to have him arrested for?”

　　“為什么?”法官問(wèn)，“他讓你贏得了無(wú)罪釋放。難道他有什么罪嗎?”

　　“Well，your honor,”replied Carlson, “I didn't have the money to pay his fee, so he went and took the car I stole.”

　　“是的，法官大人，”卡爾森回答，“我沒(méi)有錢付我的律師費(fèi)，他就把我那輛偷來(lái)的車開走了。”

　　外國(guó)經(jīng)典幽默笑話：以色列的出租車

　　An American tourist was riding in a taxi in Israel. As the taxi approached a red light, the tourist was shocked to see the driver drive straight through without even slowing down. Surprised as he was, he didn’t say anything, feeling himself a "guest" and not wanting to make waves.

　　一個(gè)美國(guó)游客在以色列打了一輛出租車。使這個(gè)美國(guó)游客震驚的是，當(dāng)出租車開到紅燈底下的時(shí)候，司機(jī)根本沒(méi)有減速就直著沖了過(guò)去。雖然他很吃驚，但他什么也沒(méi)說(shuō)。他覺(jué)得自己是個(gè)游客不應(yīng)該找麻煩。

　　The trip continued without event until the next intersection. This time the light was green and，to the American' s dismay, the cab driver brought the vehicle to a grinding halt. Unable to contain his astonishment, he turns to the driver: "Listen,” he says ,“ when you went through the red light, I didn't say anything. But, why, in heaven’s name，are you stopping at a green light?!”

　　一切都很順利，直到下一個(gè)十字路口。這回是綠燈，可讓美國(guó)人驚愕的是那個(gè)司機(jī)踩剎車停了下來(lái)。他再也憋不住了，就問(wèn)司機(jī):“我問(wèn)你，剛才你闖紅燈我什么都沒(méi)說(shuō)，可這回是綠燈為什么你卻停了下來(lái)?”

　　The Israeli driver looks at him as if the American was deranged: "Are you crazy?!” he shouts. "The other guy has a red light一do you want to get us killed?!”

　　那個(gè)以色列司機(jī)看著那美國(guó)人，驚訝的喊道:“你瘋了嗎?另一個(gè)司機(jī)現(xiàn)在正要闖紅燈，難道你想找死嗎?”