生活幽默英語(yǔ)故事三則

　　在日常繁忙的生活，也不要忘記了放松自己。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)生活幽默英語(yǔ)故事三則，希望大家喜歡!

　　生活幽默英語(yǔ)故事：窈窕塑身

　　A healthy mind is in a healthy body.

　　健全的精神寓于健康的體魄。

　　A woman named Shirley was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai Hospital. While on the op-erating table, she had a near-death experience.She saw God.

　　一個(gè)叫雪莉的婦女來(lái)自貝弗利山。一天，她心臟病發(fā)作，被送進(jìn)了塞達(dá)斯辛耐醫(yī)院。在手術(shù)臺(tái)上，她經(jīng)歷了生死的瞬間。她見(jiàn)到了上帝。

　　A:Is this it?

　　我就這樣完了嗎?

　　B:No,you have another 30 to 40 years to live.

　　不，你還能活三四十年。

　　( Upon her recovery ,she decided to stay in the hospital and have collagen shots, cheek implants,a face Iift, liposuction and breast augmentation.She even had someone dye. her hair. She figured since she had another 30 to 40 years, she might as well make the most of it. She walked out of Ce-dars Sinai lobby after the alst operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital.

　　心臟病好了之后，她決定待在醫(yī)院里，作膠原蛋白注射、面頰移植、臉部隆型、吸脂術(shù)以及隆胸等一系列美容整容手術(shù)。她還請(qǐng)人燙染了頭發(fā)。她想既然自己還有三四十年的活頭，就應(yīng)該好好活出個(gè)滋味兒來(lái)。她做完最后一個(gè)手術(shù)后，剛走出塞達(dá)斯辛耐醫(yī)院，就被一輛迎頭疾馳而來(lái)的救護(hù)車撞死了。)

　　A:I thought you said I had another 30 to 40 years?

　　我原以為你說(shuō)過(guò)我還能活三四十年?

　　B:Shirley!I didn't recognize you!

　　雪莉!我沒(méi)認(rèn)出是你!

　　生活幽默英語(yǔ)故事：泡泡溫泉

　　A:Tom,look at your shoes.How dirty they are! You must clear hem.

　　湯姆，看看你的鞋子，多臟呀，你必須洗一洗了。

　　B:Oh.Mother,but I cleaned them only yesterday.

　　噢，媽媽，可我昨天才洗過(guò)的。

　　A:But they are dirty now.You must clean them again.

　　可現(xiàn)在它們又臟了，你再洗一次吧。

　　B:I don't want to clean them today. Even if I clean them today,they will be dirty again tomorrow.

　　我今天不想洗，我即使今天把鞋洗了，明天還會(huì)臟的。

　　A:OK,don't clean them then.

　　好吧，那就別洗了。

　　(ln the evening Tom came back from school.he was very hungry.

　　晚上湯姆放學(xué)回到家，他非常餓。)

　　B:Mother,give me something to eat, please.

　　媽媽，請(qǐng)給我拿些吃的吧?

　　A:You had your breakfast in the morning, Tom, and you had your lunch at school.

　　湯姆，你早晨吃了早飯，在學(xué)校吃了午飯。

　　B:But I am hungry now.

　　可我現(xiàn)在又餓了。

　　A:Oh,really? But even if Igive you something to eat today, you will be hungry again tomorrow.

　　噢，真的嗎?可是即使今天我給你吃的明天你還會(huì)餓呀。

　　生活幽默英語(yǔ)故事：喂養(yǎng)寵物

　　Birds in their little nests agree.

　　鳥在巢中不相爭(zhēng)。

　　A small child was giving a bath to a tiny and dirty kitten in the gar-den. while an ojd lady passing by.

　　一個(gè)小男孩在花園里給一只身上很臟的小花貓洗澡，正在這時(shí)，一個(gè)上了年紀(jì)的女士從旁邊經(jīng)過(guò)。

　　A:Sonny.you shouldn't bathe a kitty in cold waLer.He will get sick and die.

　　小家伙，你不應(yīng)該在涼水中給小貓洗澡，他會(huì)生病,甚至?xí)馈?/p>

　　(The child go on with his job.barely liatening to her.Two houra Wer,the lacjy was retumiWg when ahe saw the boy sittinS on the ground and cring.with the dead kitten lying beaide him.

　　可是，小男孩繼續(xù)給小貓洗澡，幾乎對(duì)那位女士置之不理。兩小時(shí)以后，那位女士返回時(shí)看見(jiàn)那個(gè)小男孩坐在地上哭泣，小貓?zhí)稍谒纳砼裕懒恕?

　　B:Didn't I tell you .sonny.that the kitty would die if you wa.shed him in the cold water?

　　小家伙，我不是告訴休了嗎?如果在涼水中給小貓洗澡，他會(huì)死的。

　　A:But Auntie. he didn't die because I waahed him; he died when I was wrinpng him dry.

　　可是，阿姨，他不是因?yàn)槲医o它洗澡死的，當(dāng)我把他擰于時(shí)，他就死了。