英語笑話故事：中情局招募（雙語）

　　The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists: two men and one woman. For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.

　　"We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. You have to kill her."

　　The first man said, "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife."

　　The agent replies, "Then you're not the right man for this job."

　　The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the agent came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried, but I can't kill my wife."

　　The agent replies, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."

　　Finally, it was the woman's turn. Only she was told to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, "You guys didn't tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. I had to beat him to death with the chair."

　　美國中情局要召一個刺客的職位。在進行過所有背景調查、面談和測試之后，最終剩下三名候選人，兩個男人和一個女人。最后一輪測試，中情局官員把其中一個男人領到一扇大鐵門前，然后給他一把槍。

　　“我們要了解你能夠無條件地服從所有指令。在這扇門里有你老婆，你去把她干掉。”

　　這第一個男人說：“少開玩笑了!我絕對不可能會向我老婆開槍的。”

　　官員回答說：“那你就不適合這份工作。”

　　接著他們要求第二個男人做同樣的事。他拿了槍走進房間，5分鐘后哭著出來，說：“我試過了，但我不能殺死我的妻子。”

　　官員說：“你不具備這項工作要求的能力，帶著你老婆回家吧。”

　　最后輪到了候選者中的女人。她被要求殺死自己的丈夫。她拿槍進入房間。接著，外面聽到了兩聲槍響。然后是尖叫聲、撞擊聲、和什么東西摔在墻上的聲響。再幾分鐘，一切都安靜了。門慢慢打開，那女人站在那里。她把袖子卷起來，說：“你們這些家伙怎么不告訴我槍里沒裝子彈啊?我最后還是用椅子把他打死的!”