小學(xué)爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話故事大全
笑話是日常生活中人們消遣娛樂(lè)的一種常見(jiàn)語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象, 經(jīng)常出現(xiàn)在聊天對(duì)話、書籍或報(bào)紙雜志等。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了小學(xué)爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話故事，歡迎閱讀!
小學(xué)爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話故事：I Am Acting Like a Lady
One day when women's dresses were on sale at the FarEast Department Store, a dignified middle-aged man decided to get his wife a piece. But he soon found himself being battered by frantic women.
He stood it as long as he could; then, with head lowered and arms flailing, he plowed through the crowed.
"You there!" challenged a thrill voice. "Can't you act like a gentleman?"
"Listen," he said, "I have been acting like a gentleman for an hour. From now on, I am acting like a lady."
我要表現(xiàn)得象位女士
一天，遠(yuǎn)東百貨公司的女裝大減價(jià)，一位高貴的中年男士想給太太買一件。可是，沒(méi)過(guò)多久，他發(fā)現(xiàn)自己已被瘋狂的女人沖得踉踉蹌蹌。
他竭力忍耐著。后來(lái)，他低下頭，揮動(dòng)雙臂，擠過(guò)人群。
“你干嘛?”有人尖聲叫道，“你難道不能表現(xiàn)得象位紳士嗎?”
“聽(tīng)著，”他說(shuō)，“我已經(jīng)象紳士一樣表現(xiàn)了一個(gè)小時(shí)。從現(xiàn)在起，我要表現(xiàn)得象個(gè)女士。”
小學(xué)爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話故事：How Much Is It?
It was winter, and Mrs. Hermann wanted to do a lot of shopping, so she waited until it was Saturday, when her husband was free, and she took him to the shops with her to pay for everything and to carry her parcels. They went to a lot of shops, and Mrs. Hermann bought a lot of things. She often stopped and said, "Look, Joe! Isn't that beautiful!"
He then answered, "All right, dear, How much is it?" and took his money out to pay for it.
It was dark when they came out of the last shop, and Mr. Hermann was tired and thinking about other things, like a nice drink by the side of a warm fire at home. Suddenly his wife looked up at the sky and said, "Look at that beautiful moon, Joe!"
Without stopping, Mr. Hermann answered, "All right, dear, How much is it?"
多少錢?
嚴(yán)冬來(lái)臨，荷曼太太想采購(gòu)一大批東西，所以她就一直等到周六丈夫有空的時(shí)候，她拖著他去商店付錢連帶拎包裹。他們?nèi)チ嗽S多商店，荷曼太太買了一大堆東西。她經(jīng)常停下腳步說(shuō)道：“看，喬伊!那個(gè)多漂亮!”
他總是回答：“好吧!親愛(ài)的，多少錢?”然后掏錢去付款。
他們從最后一家商店出來(lái)的時(shí)候夜幕已經(jīng)降臨，荷曼先生已精疲力盡了。他心里想著其它事情，比如在家里暖暖的火爐邊呷口美酒。突然他太太仰望天空，說(shuō)道：“看那月亮多美，喬伊!”
荷曼先生不加思索答道：“好吧，親愛(ài)的，多少錢?”
小學(xué)爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話故事：Three Whistles
I promised my girlfriend a gold necklace for her birthday, but when the jeweler quoted a price for one we liked, I let out a long, low whistle. "And how much are they then?" I asked, pointing to another tray.
"You, sir," replied the jeweler, "about three whistles."
三聲口哨
我答應(yīng)過(guò)我的女朋友過(guò)生日進(jìn)送她一條金項(xiàng)鏈。可是當(dāng)珠寶商報(bào)出我們看中的那條項(xiàng)鏈的價(jià)格時(shí)，我低低地打了個(gè)長(zhǎng)口哨。“那這條項(xiàng)鏈多少錢呢?”我指著另一個(gè)盤子里的項(xiàng)鏈問(wèn)。
“先生，對(duì)你來(lái)說(shuō)，”珠寶商答道，“大約值三聲口哨。”
小學(xué)爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話故事：Early Shopper
It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. "What are you charged with?" he asked.
"Doing my christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.
"That's no offense," replied the judge, "How early were you doing this shopping?"
"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.
采購(gòu)過(guò)早
那天是圣誕節(jié)，法官在審訊犯人時(shí)也有點(diǎn)惻隱之心。“你為什么而被起訴?”他問(wèn)。
“采購(gòu)圣誕節(jié)物品過(guò)早。”被告答。
“這不算犯法，”法官回答，“你購(gòu)物多早?”
在商店開(kāi)門之前，“犯人應(yīng)道。
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