英語簡短笑話大全爆笑
在交際場合,能恰到好處地講個笑話或自創一個幽默,不僅可以體現自己的語言水平,還可以提升個人魅力。學習啦小編整理了簡短爆笑英語笑話，歡迎閱讀!
簡短爆笑英語笑話篇一
An old man lived alone in Northern Ireland. His only son was in prison.
一個老人獨居在北愛爾蘭，他的獨生子正在坐牢。
The old man wanted to plant some potatoes in his garden but he didn't know anyone whowould help him plow up the garden.He wrote to his son about it, and received this reply, ForHEAVENS SAKE, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the GUNS!
老人想在花園里種些土豆，但不知道誰可以幫忙把泥土翻松。他寫信想兒子提及此事，兒子回信說道：“看在上帝的面上，千萬不要翻松花園的泥土，我把槍埋在那兒了。”
At 4 AM the next morning, a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden,but didn't find any guns.Confused, the man wrote to his son telling him what happened andasking him what to do next.His son's reply was: Just plant your potatoes.
第二天凌晨4點，一隊英國士兵出現在老人家中，在花園把土地翻遍，但并沒有找到任何槍支。”老人寫信告訴兒子這件奇怪的事情，問到底發生了什么事情，下一步應該怎么做。兒子回信道：“你只管種土豆好了。”
簡短爆笑英語笑話篇二
At 2 a. m. Mrs. Culkin was convinced that she had heard a prowler in the living-room. Tiptoedown-stairs, she told her husband, "Don' t turn on the lights. Sneak up him before he knowswhat's happening."Dutifully Mr. Culkin put on his robe. Just as he reached the bedroom door,his wife added, "And when you come back, bring me a glass of milk."
半夜兩點，科爾肯太太確信聽到客廳有賊，便對丈夫說：“別開燈，躡手躡腳下樓，別讓賊發覺，悄悄靠近他。” 科爾肯先生披上外套，責無旁貸地去捉賊。剛走到臥室門口，他妻子又補充說：“回來時給我捎杯牛奶。”
簡短爆笑英語笑話篇三
No matter which girls he brought home, the young man found disapproval from his mother. Afriend gave him advice."Find a girl just like your mother -- then, she's bound to like her." Sothe young man searched and searched, and finally found the girl. He told his friendlyadviser:"Just like you said, I found a girl who looked, talked, dressed, and even cooked likemother, And just as you said, mother liked her". "So," asked the friend, "whathappened?""Nothing," said the young man. " My father hates her!".
有個小伙子發現，無論他帶什么女孩子回家，媽媽都不贊成。一位朋友建議他，“你找一個像你母親一樣的女孩吧——你母親肯定會喜歡她的”。這個小伙子就找啊找啊，終于找到了一個女孩。他告訴自己的朋友：“就像你說的，我找到了一個女孩，無論在感覺、說話、打扮，甚至烹飪手藝都很像母親的，而且真的像你說的那樣，媽媽很喜歡她。”“那么，”他的朋友問到，“發生了什么事?”“沒事，”小伙子說，我父親很討厭她!”
簡短爆笑英語笑話篇四
When my printer's type began to go faint, I called a repair shop where a friendly man told methat the printer probably needed only to be cleaned.
由于我的打印機不能打印出清晰的字來，我就打電話給維修部。電話是一位非常和藹的男人接的，他說我的打印機也許只是需要清理一下。
Because the shop charged 50 pounds for such cleanings, he told me, it would be better for meto read the printer's directions and try the job myself.
他還說，如果讓維修部清理的話要交50英鎊的清理費，讓我最好看看使用手冊自己試著清理。
Pleasantly surprised by his words, I asked, "Does your boss know that you discouragebusiness?"
當時我真的被他的話感動了，就問他：“你們老板知道你這樣拒絕生意么?”
"Actually it's my boss's idea," the employee replied. "We usually make more money on repairs ifwe let people try to repair things themselves first."
“事實上，這就是我們老板的主意，”雇員答道：“因為如果我們讓用戶先自行修理打印機的話就能掙更多的錢。”
看了“簡短爆笑英語笑話”的人還看了：