英語笑話大全
民間笑話故事像神話小說等民間文學一樣，是廣大勞動人民在長期的生產勞動和與自然界作斗爭的過程中，以口頭形式創作和傳承的文學體裁。小編精心收集了爆笑英語小笑話，供大家欣賞學習!
爆笑英語小笑話篇1
Lawyer’s Advice
律師的忠告
A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by aman who asked advice on how to hanle his ulcer.
有一位醫生和一位律師出席一場雞尾酒會，當時有一名男子走近這位醫生詢問有關如何處理他的潰瘍的忠告。
The doctor mumbled some medical advice,then turned to the lawyer and asked,
這位醫生就咕嚕咕嚕說了一些醫療上的忠告，然后轉向這位律師。
"How do you handled the situation when you are asked for advice during a social function?"
并問他：“當你在社交宴會場合中被人詢間忠告的時候，你都怎么處理這個情形呢?”
"Just send an account for such advice" replied the lawyer.
這位律師回答說： “就寄出一張聽取忠告的賬單呀”。
On the next morning the doctor arrived at his surgery and issues the ulcer-stricken man a account.
下一天早上，這位醫生來到他的診療窒;開出一張五十元賬單給這名罹患潰瘍的男子。
That afternoon he received a 0 account from the lawyer.
而在那天下午他竟然就收到一張從律師那里寄來的一百元賬單。
爆笑英語小笑話篇2
A Materialistic Lawyer
唯物主義的律師
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW,
有一位律師打開他的 BMW 座車車門，
when suddenly a car came along and hit the door,ripping it off completely.
當時剛好有一輛車子突然駛來撞上車門，而且把它完全給扯了下來。
When the police arrived at the scene,the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage tohis precious BMW.
當警察到達現場的時候，這名律師正在對他的昂貴BMW座車所受到的損害，痛苦地抱怨不已。他滿腹牢騷的向警察嘀咕說：
"Officer,look what they've done to my BMW",he whined.
“警官，你瞧瞧他們對我的 BMW所干的好事啦!”
"You lawyers are so materialistic,you make me sick!!!"retorted the officer,
這名警官卻回嘴說，“ 你們這些律師實在太唯物主義了，你真讓我覺得惡心!”
"You're so worried about your stuid BMW that you didn't even notice that your left arm wasripped off!!!"
“你竟然這么擔心你一的笨BMW車子，卻沒注意到你的左手臂被扯斷了”
"Oh my God!" replied the lawyer,finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm oncewas,"Where's my Rolex?!"
這名律師最后注意到流著血的左肩膀，也就是他的手臂原先所在之處，他回答說：“哦，我的天哪!我的勞動士手表在哪里呀?”
爆笑英語小笑話篇3
A man walks into a confession booth and says,"I have sinned."
有一個男人走進告解室說：“我犯罪了”。
"What did you do?"asks the priest.
神父 問 ：“你做了什么?”
"I committed a murder."
“我犯了謀殺罪”
The priest says,"take a drink out of the holy cup and you will be forgiven."
神父說：“你喝一口圣杯的圣水，你就得饒恕。”
A man walks into the confession booth and says ,"I have sinned."
有一個男人走進告解室說：“我犯罪了”。
The priest asks him ,"what did you do?"
神父問他： “你做了什么?”
"I robbed six banks."
“我搶了六家銀行”
The priest says, "take a drink out of the holy cup and you will be forgiven."
神父說：“你喝一口圣杯的圣水，你就得饒恕。”
Another man walks into the confession booth and says ," I have sinned ."
另一個男人走進告解室說：“我犯罪了”。
" What did you do?" asks the priest,
神父問：“你做了什么?”
"I broke the holy cup."
“我把圣杯打破了”。
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